Lonely

Well he's gone. And by him I mean David. He was sworn into the Air Force today around 11. We said good-bye shortly there after. Hardest thing I think I'll ever have to do. I tried so hard to be strong but I couldn't help sobbing on his shoulder. But I am proud I never once asked him to stay. I just cried, hard, for a minute then collected myself enough to kiss him and tell him I love him and I was proud of him, then I walked out with my head held high. And stayed strong all day, till now. It's 11:35 and I can't bring myself to go to bed yet. Not ready to sleep alone, for at least 4 more months. My apartment used to feel so small now it seems a little bigger and much more lonely.
David always puts the boys to bed so tonight was a little strange for them. Tristan seems to be adjusting ok and he was the one I was worried about. He keeps telling me that Daddy is on an airplane and that we will be flying with him soon. But Andrew funnily enough is not adjusting well. He's been waking up every hour since I put him down and crying for "Da Da". He just gets more aggravated when I go in and try and calm him. Poor kid. I know how he feels.
For any woman who has been through this and survived, I commend you. You are truly remarkable.