Well so life was only boring till yesterday afternoon after the boys napped. Holy Cow!! All of a sudden I had to make dinner, do dishes, feed both kids, get the laundry folded, and pick up David from work. I had already done most fo my cleaning in the morning but then all of a sudden my house looked like I hadn't done anything!! I was so overwhemled and stressed. Well I had better learn some balance and figure out how to teach Tristan to do dishes and fold laundry!!! He thinks he can but he only adds to the mess when he thinks he is helping.
Well David's birthday turned out okay after all. Or so he says. I made him some cinnamon rolls and his favorite dinner. We had our nieghboors the Royers over for dinner and they brought a cheesecake for David. I also got him a bunch of music downloads for his new iPod. He seemed really happy but tired. Poor guy. We are both suffering from lack of sleep. At least I can sit on the couch all day if needed. He has to go to work and do manual labor, and then come home and take care of me and the boys!! But he is pretty good and never complains.
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Spoke too Soon
Posted by Susan at 7:49 AM
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4 comments:
You got an amazing winner of a hsuband babe. He needs more kisses, I'm sure of it.
Oh you poor thing I know how it is. Good job Dave at taking such good care of your fam. your a great guy. I love you susan and hang in there it does get better and easier I promise. If you ever need to call to complain, cry, scream, or just chat I am always here and you know I understand. Love ya
I know exactly what you mean. I often felt the same way at that point and still do sometimes. Things seem really easy and you are happy with life and then it's like something explodes! I went to a conference a few weeks ago on one of those days. The lady said to choose one thing to do every day and everything else is a bonus. I try to do three pretty big things a day because the one thing didn't work for me. But if I accomplish three of my simple goals every day I feel pretty good about myself. And of course I point out all I did to Caleb. :)
Susan,
I'll share what I teach new (and less new) mothers. Here are the NORMAL stages you will expereince as you build your family. Keep in mind all of the time that what you are experiencind is NORMAL for most women in your situation.
1. One child is exhausting. You have to do and be everything for that child. It starts out pretty easy compared to when you have more, but before long, the level of entertainment you have to provide can leave you quite tired. Remember that there are two of you and the minute your husband comes home, your job should be cut in half - either he helps with your remaining home tasks, or he helps with the little one. Usually they chose the little one and it is wonderful!
2. With two children, mothers tend to feel incredibly guilty. They find that they simply can't do for two what they did for one in a timely manner. The older one has to wait (everybody always has to wait) for his dinner because the baby needs feeding. The baby has to wait for feeding because the older one has already been hungry an extra hour - and so on. Everybody waits, and that waiting is because Mom simply can't do what she once did with effeciency. Your best help - develop some routines, so that you know when there is a minute, you'll know exactly what you can do quickly. Again, be grateful if you are blessed with a two-parent home. It often means that there is a time when there are two of you for two children.
3. Three children - Insanity, overwhelm, fear - all sorts of intense emotions. You now have more children than you have hands, you now have more children than you have laps, you now have more children than space in your car for the children and all the paraphenela. Going shoppint alone with three kids is insanity. Going to the park - more insanity. If one child runs away, who do you leave to chase after him? Insanity. And it seems that it will never end. Your best friend - leaving children home with husband while you shop. Taking husband with you to the park so you can watch the baby and he can play with the kids, trading onr or two days a week with another mother - one day she goes out and her kids play with yours, or you go out and your kids play with hers. Alternate days per week, or alternate weeks. Once a month cooking, or cooking double each time and freezing the other half for another meal. Simplify.
4. Four children - suddenly you wake up and find that as a family you flow easily, you are confident as a mother, things are simply much, much better and continue to get better with each child. Now, if you wait too long between births, this doesn't happen. If there are five year gaps, well, it is just like starting over. If you have twins, remember to adjust your stage. Your biggest help: Home school. Whey in the name of eveyrthing the Lord has blessed us with, would any of us willingly send our OLDEST to school and be stuck in the "Three children" mode out of choice?
Look up Flylady.com the program is free, sign up and receive way too many emails but they delete in a second. Follow her program. Don't go over board, take it easy so it will last. It is the biggest help for home management I've ever seen.
I love you - you are doing great - and are feeling exactly what so many other mothers feel in your position - so normal. If it is normal, instead of fighting it, find solutions, okay?
Cherie
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